i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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