can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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