just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
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