I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
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dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
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I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
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