i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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