whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize