Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
sarcasm needs its own font
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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