How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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