I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize