still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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