when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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