Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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