did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize