id be glad to
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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