Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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