I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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