her vagine was all disorganized.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize