Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
The dick lei will go down in squad history
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize