I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
You ruined the universe
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize