Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize