I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
All I want is dick and wine.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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