Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
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Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize