what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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