why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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