Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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