I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
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The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
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