The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize