its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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