I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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