I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm just crazy horny about you
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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