Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize