My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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