I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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