I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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