You work out of a Hotel?
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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