Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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