Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
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