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  • Submitted by SnidelyKWhiplash on Jan 5, 12 at 3:27pm

    And it only takes one to say, "put a condom on or you're not getting in me, let alone cuming in me."

  • Submitted by ReesesPoofs on Jan 5, 12 at 3:49pm

    dont be a dummy cum on her tummy

    • 32 45
      Submitted by Cocaineranger on Jan 5, 12 at 9:37pm

      haha never heard this one before.. thank you!

  • Submitted by friedbunnies on Jan 6, 12 at 1:19am

    Don't raise your letters at me

  • Submitted by DOGFARTS on Jan 5, 12 at 11:04pm

    What did you think his scrotum was full ? Confetti????

    • 32 45
      Submitted by BirdDog on Jan 6, 12 at 11:07am

      That would be way cooler, and cleaner

      • 33 43
        Submitted by Cocaineranger on Jan 6, 12 at 11:24pm

        imagine the possibilities.. everytime you bang. boom.. instant party, literally.

  • Submitted by Hedonistic on Jan 5, 12 at 3:23pm

    And it only takes one to buy Plan B, and spoiler alert, it could easily be the woman that doesn't want her uterus occupied.

    • 33 44
      Submitted by nunubeest on Jan 5, 12 at 4:37pm

      you talk like its an armed occupation with resistance groups and curfews

      • 44 39
        Submitted by Hedonistic on Jan 5, 12 at 5:09pm

        Do you prefer "inhabited by a parasite leeching from her life force"? I think that gets us back to Alien.

        • 26 44
          Submitted by nunubeest on Jan 5, 12 at 5:58pm

          punch it bishop

        • 38 41
          Submitted by mad2physicist on Jan 6, 12 at 12:38am

          I prefer to refer to the fetus as a parasite, yes.

    • 34 50
      Submitted by EMTPirate on Jan 6, 12 at 5:25am

      And like other occupations it will be done without consent, cost the person in charge a lot of money, and cry frequently for whatever it wants.

  • 97 48
    Submitted by nunubeest on Jan 5, 12 at 5:59pm

    lol if you read exactly as she wrote it she's texting her rapist

    • 35 43
      Submitted by WApple on Jan 5, 12 at 10:45pm

      that's how I read it too

  • 88 58
    Submitted by bigcity21 on Jan 5, 12 at 4:34pm

    Ejaculate without consent? Cart before the horse? TROJAN MAN!!!

  • Submitted by nunubeest on Jan 5, 12 at 4:36pm

    lol girl can open her legs but moment shit gets serious its all the mans fault..hows that for equality

  • 66 49
    Submitted by D71 on Jan 6, 12 at 12:50pm

    so in other words you wanted him to pound you until he was ready to blow then pull out and shoot it all over your tits and face? you shoulda made that known, I bet he would've in a heart beat

  • 58 49
    Submitted by raichu100 on Jan 8, 12 at 10:55am

    What the actual fuck is with everyone coming on here and blaming the woman for what happened like it's automatically 100% her fault. Gross.

  • 62 57
    Submitted by jokinjoe20 on Jan 5, 12 at 3:13pm

    uh o prego

  • 66 84
    Submitted by JohnTheBaptist on Jan 5, 12 at 3:33pm

    Lol. Both of them have a scrotum full of semen.

  • 47 51
    Submitted by BirdDog on Jan 6, 12 at 11:06am

    Of the two tangoers, the one to ejactulate into the other without consent....Alex, what is the scrotum full of semen?

  • 36 47
    Submitted by 1980DirtNasty on Jan 8, 12 at 3:08am

    Thats why I, jizz in my pants! Hahaha lmao

  • 38 52
    Submitted by jprincess on Jan 5, 12 at 9:22pm

    Ewwwwwwwww

  • 33 58
    Submitted by ojg15 on Jan 7, 12 at 11:40am

    No need to yell, Babe..

  • 36 64
    Submitted by PHD1026 on Jan 7, 12 at 12:02am

    If she's a slut.....she will take it in the butt

  • 48 89
    Submitted by mmmmbop on Jan 5, 12 at 7:05pm

    Spoiler alert. the comma goes after and

    • 35 46
      Submitted by realitycheck20 on Jan 5, 12 at 9:50pm

      No it actually doesn't

      • 31 39
        Submitted by BarryDingle on Jan 6, 12 at 4:10am

        yes, actually, it does.

    • 30 51
      Submitted by ojg15 on Jan 7, 12 at 11:31am

      Pretty sure, in this case, it goes both before and after. Either way, nice grammar comment with a period which should be a semicolon, and no capital afterwards..

  • 37 74
    Submitted by Phys on Jan 5, 12 at 10:23pm

    Make her into a wetback...

    • 37 38
      Submitted by nunubeest on Jan 5, 12 at 10:54pm

      by giving her welfare and food and benefits for committing a crime then have her stand at a home depot parking lot with 30 others of her making under the table income?

      • 32 45
        Submitted by lalalindz on Jan 6, 12 at 1:58am

        holy crap nunu...I thought you were funny at first...but you're kinda a bigot.

        • 33 46
          Submitted by nunubeest on Jan 6, 12 at 3:20am

          I'm an equal opportunity racist..I hate everyone because they have all shown me what shitty people we are as a whole...its individuals who I like and boo hook if you can't shrug off some light racist jokes on a site filled with drunken rants about every debauchery known then sesame street is just up the road they'll be glad to have you

  • 5 11
    Submitted by jpwisers on Oct 6, 13 at 2:24pm

    Should da worn a condom

  • Submitted by TwistedSista83 on Jan 5, 12 at 7:20pm

    responsible people dont find themselves in situations where this happens-guy or girl. So OP should not try to avoid responsibility by blaming the other person completely. 1. She should have been on birth control, 2. She shouldnt have been wasted-because you were so drunk you couldnt consent to sex, also makes me wonder if you were possibly so drunk you dont recall consenting to sex? 3. Grow up!! Alcoholism has help!!!

    • 35 50
      Submitted by myeyesarescarred on Jan 6, 12 at 2:04pm

      What? who said who was drunk? this can happen when your completely sober too. If OP was that worried about getting pregnant, she should have made sure a condom was used. Act like an adult, end of story.

  • Submitted by porksword on Jan 5, 12 at 3:41pm

    Spoiler alert! The scrotum holds zero semen, that would be the prostate. What's she mad about anyway? At least you didn't shoot it in her hair.

    • 37 40
      Submitted by harbqll on Jan 5, 12 at 6:10pm

      Actually, the prostate also holds zero semen, that would be the seminal vesicles.

      • 34 35
        Submitted by nunubeest on Jan 5, 12 at 7:12pm

        SCIENCE!!

        • 34 50
          Submitted by SnidelyKWhiplash on Jan 5, 12 at 7:32pm

          Good Heavens Miss Yamamoto, you're beautiful!

      • 32 54
        Submitted by porksword on Jan 5, 12 at 7:31pm

        Dammit, you spoiled my alert! I get half credit at least.