Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Shame is for Republicans.
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