I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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