i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
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