if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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