Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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