We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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