Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize