im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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