Umm I'm too high to move.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Drunk is not a location!
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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