I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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