All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize