yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
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Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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