i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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